So I was reading Mike's bulletin today and just reveled in his genius. Ahh. I wish I could even think with a just a fraction of the intellect and clarity that he has. But, alas, I suppose I'm just a little slow. And my writing has been declining in quality for the last two years. And now I'm left with shit.
Anyway. I find it funny that there's only one person that can see this..mainly because I only told one person about it. Unless you're Marie who remembered what the URL to my blog is. And unless you're Chris who, for some reason still remembers my password and e-mail. So I'm going to take this second to say hello to the person who is on my preferred list. Hey there.
My dad came home tonight. He's home for the first time in two weeks, and even though I'd like to say that I missed him and that it's been weird not having him around, I really can't bring myself to. Maybe it's because he's been checking up on me over the phone at least three times a week. Maybe it's because I really really like the idea of getting home at 2:30 and spending the next seven hours playing guitar, talking on the phone, watching Scrubs, making my own food.. Rachelle asked me today why I like being alone so much..and it made me feel just a little bit awkward being in my own skin, like I'm some sort of loner. But, what's wrong with having solitary time? I've been so surrounded by people bombarding me with attention. And I almost hate attention on some days. I mean, I love it from certain people, and if you're reading this, you're probably one of those people. But just being in a big empty house with no one and nothing to give attention to or receive it from is so comforting..almost therapeutic. I like being able to run around and knowing no one will be bothered. I like knowing that I can sing as loud as I possibly can knowing no one will be able to know how badly I can't carry a tune. And I absolutely love going to the bathroom and not having to close the door. It's just so liberating.
So, I suppose this ends those days..considering that my dad now doesn't have a job and is going for the father of the year role or something like that. He's going to be home all the time, an pick me up from school and take me to practices. It's going to be annoying. Maybe.
Well I guess I'll just have to see.
Kelsey Rae
About
- Kelsey Rae
- Los Angeles
- The theme is the theme of humiliation, which is the square root of sin, as opposed to the freedom from humiliation, and love, which is the square root of wonderful.