I got back from Valyermo today, and the high I'm on is unbelievable. I'm exhausted and dead tired, but my mind is racing and my heart is lifted. I really didn't think that this experience would be as rewarding as it came out to be, only because I knew that it wasn't mine, it was the experience of fifty or so kids that didn't know what to expect, and didn't know how to react. But being trusted with everything that they've been through has left me stunned and enlightened. I can't say any more other than that, otherwise I would only be taking away from what Valyermo is.
I'll leave it to this.
I have gained some amazing new friends, an invaluable piece of paper, and the ability to live my words. As far as what I've lost: a few inhibitions, a few insecurities, and a grandma.
And then, when I got back, I disappointed myself greatly. The truth is, I want to fix it, but I'm not sure if they do. And if they do want to, it sure is some way to show it. I'm somewhat disappointed in myself for letting it get this bad, but now I know what I have to try to work harder on. Hopefully it will end well.
Tonight was senior night, and even though my parents couldn't be there, I was escorted by two of the greatest people I know: someone that I have loved and cherished as a friend for several years now, and some douchebag that I've grown very fond of.
I wouldn't have had it any other way.
Goodnight to all, I'm off to call a friend. Now do me a favor and listen to some beautiful music that makes you feel warm and secure.
Kelsey Rae
